Yippee

Yippee Part Two – First Half is Done!!!!!

A commitment to #NaNoWriMo has led to nearly 12,500 words / 50 pages so far for the month, with five more days still to go. At this point, however, I’ll be hitting the pause button on writing to turn to some editing. I’d like to get the first half polished and out to my preview editor and readers before I dive into the second half.

To celebrate, here are few of my favorite lines so far. Heck, my sons had highlight reels for their college sports recruiting, so why can’t I?

Is there one which jumps out at you?  Pulls you in to want to read more?  I hope so! I’d love to hear which one resonates the most.

  • The darkness of the dirt slowly filled the hole and covered the light of the petals. 
  • She fell into the blue ocean of his eyes, an ocean searching for a beacon to calm the stormy seas of his soul.
  • Her matriculation ticket card positioned on top of her notebook, centered and visible to proclaim her right to the seat. 
  • Woven into the deep blue-black fabric sky above the manger beamed a white shape, a glow of triangles interlocked at a center, their eight points splaying outward to summon and guide. The North Star.
  • This time her mother listened. Eliza no longer spewed a child’s chatter. She spoke a woman’s words. 
  • The hand-inked illustration displayed a map, rivers and streams marked boundaries. Other lines followed roads across the countryside. On these pages she hoped to find a map to guide her to more answers. 
  • Crumpled balls of scrap paper littered the desk tops, clenched fists of frustration. 
  • She unpinned her hat and with a slight shake of her head, she strode toward the dining room, breathing in the aromas of the pork roast, a faint cinnamon scent from the stewed apples. The thought of the crisp, succulent, peppered pork skin teased her taste buds. She hoped they had saved her favorite end piece for her. 
  • Is there something more, something else for me, a freedom to choose a different path?
  • This situation, this sense of limbo, of no hope. This, this is worse.
  • Her shoulders shuddered with each pulse as she retched from the bottom of her gut, pulling the darkness in her soul with it. 
  • Indulging the depths of my despair to find me again. Yielding to the pleasure of loving a woman again. 

6 thoughts on “First Half Done

  1. I like: “Her shoulders shuddered with each pulse as she reached from the bottom of her gut, pulling the darkness of her soul with it.” Bonnie

    Sent from my iPad

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    Liked by 1 person

  2. Woohoo–halfway! I can never quite get into NaNoWriMo but it seems you’ve done well with it.

    You’ve got a lot of good lines there. This one is a great metaphor: “Crumpled balls of scrap paper littered the desk tops, clenched fists of frustration.”

    Like

  3. I’m lucky to have found a great FB group and we organized our own unofficial NaNoWriMo – not as much pressure. I like the scraps of paper metaphor too. I need to go back and insert some more, I think. Wondering what is a good balance? Sometimes, I feel like every paragraph in a book has metaphors and comparisons. Does that drain away from a reader’s imaginations?

    Like

    1. Thanks Barb! The “hand inked illustrations” is a descriptor for a book – any guesses of which book? Your choices, along with the others mentioned here, give me reassurance since four different lines are highlighted. I’d love to have you read the rest of the first half.

      Liked by 1 person

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